I have always compared my journey with the Father to Abraham when God told him to go to a land that He would show him. Abraham did not know where he was going; he was just obedient to the Word of God. Abraham had faith that God would lead him to the land He had promised.  I, in comparison, have always had faith that God would also show me the land that He, or at least I thought, told me. This journey has led me to many places which you, if you have not already, can read on this blog site in a number of different articles that I have written in the past few years. However, I am beginning to wonder if my journey has been more like the children of Israel wondering around in the desert for 40 years. This thought just came to me a little while ago. Could it be? Could it be that my journey has been just a mere wondering around in the wilderness, or is it, in fact, a journey of faith.

I look at myself today and I am not sure who I am anymore. There was a time that I could identify myself. I was a preacher of the Gospel of Christ. I was a music minister, youth pastor, and evangelist. I was a Christian radio man. I know that these are just titles, but I was comfortable with who I was, and I believed in what I was doing then. Today I stand today completely useless. I am no good to the Baptist, charismatics, or any other denomination or “non-denomination denomination”. I am no good to “community” living. I have been so engrossed by systematic Christianity that I am deemed useless to them.

You know…I don’t ever remember reading where Abraham went here and there asking God…”Is this the land Lord…How about this one Lord…not this one either?” Yet, this has been my journey up to this point, or at least It is how I am perceiving it right now. I do believe, without an inch of doubt, that God had opened my eyes to the Truth of westernised Christianity. My heart is, to this day, very heavy for the church. I believe that so many are deceived into thinking that their way of “doing church” is the pleasing God; however, what good is such revelation? What is it worth to know that bible studies, sermons, church programs, pulpits, pews, and steeples have become a stink in the nostrils of All Mighty God. Not that all of these things in themselves are bad, but what we have made them has become nothing more than the ritualistic sacrifices the Israelite’s where making that made the Father want to vomit so many years ago. Tell me what good is such understanding? It is not like I can convince anyone of such truth. Most, if not all, of those in this deception will never be convinced that it is so. After all… They have it all figured out remember. Who knows? I am telling you I am no good for anything anymore.

My journey has been to find a land that I believe God has promised. A place where westernized Christianity has no place in the hearts of the residence. A place where the “Spirit of Religion” can not enter into the gates. A place where Love is the foundation and NOTHING more. A place where God is all that matters and NOTHING else. A place where the Spirit of God has  the lead and not some man. A place where it’s residence don’t turn their backs and run away from their own. A place where the residence gather together for the mere purpose of being together, praising our Lord, and not to have bible debates, sermons, or any one person dominating the time. I have been looking for a place where the only thing we know for sure is that we know nothing, and God knows all. I have been looking for a people who don’t have all the answers, but can lead you to the One who does. A place where God Himself defines who we are to the people around us and not our interpretation of the scriptures, doctrines, or the name we have on the sign out front. A place where they don’t hold scriptures, doctrines, customs, traditions, or anything above The Father. I have been looking for a place where God truly does sit on the throne, and not just have a people who says He does. I long for a place that  has Jesus as the one we model our lives after, and not (though great men of God) Peter, Paul, or anyone ells in scripture or of this world. A place where judgement still belongs to God and not His servants. A place where all the residence are, as God sees them,…equal. A place where each member can thrive and be molded in the hands of The Living God to be placed exactly in the Body where he or she is supposed to be, thus bringing life to that part of the body. I can go on forever here, but it is late and I am tired, so let’s rap this up.

I guess you can call me Martin Luther King Jr and say I am just dreaming, and that there is no such place this side of Heaven. Maybe your right. Maybe I have just been wondering around in the wilderness for 40 years. Maybe I am just a lost child and not a Abraham. Maybe I should just give up searching, I definitely feel like it. Maybe I should just start my own denomination (makes me sick just saying that). I don’t know. I really don’t. I don’t have all the answers; right now I feel I have zero answers.  I do know that God is my Father, and I Will go where he leads me. I have nothing more. I just pray that He speaks soon.

Anyway…that is where my pathetic mind is at the moment. As always, my brain is in full speed. It is 2:44am right now, that should say something. I will attempt a little sleep now. God bless all the readers of this blog. I love you, and, as always, I pray that God will lead us all into the fullness of Him.